Cheryl Ho's Blog; the art of conversation » Jokes & Comedies http://cherylho.net Sun, 15 Nov 2009 03:42:52 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 en hourly 1 On Flower Gerr and Pussy Willows http://cherylho.net/2009/01/16/on-flower-gerr-and-pussy-willows/ http://cherylho.net/2009/01/16/on-flower-gerr-and-pussy-willows/#comments Thu, 15 Jan 2009 17:06:57 +0000 Cheryl http://cherylho.net/?p=174

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I managed to bring my darling D60 to work the other day, and took it for a short tour while there were no customers. Hehe =)

Since I love to play with pussy willows, I snapped a lot on them.
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I did snap some fresh orchids, which are really pretty. But I’ll put that up some other day, or later on.

Now it’s story telling time.

The story is like this.

Today I had a customer, a very WEIRD one. The following is the conversation between the customer and myself:
 

“Errrr, halo? Excuse me? Are you working here?”
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“Ahh yes. How can I help you?”
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“This one, real flower ah?”
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“No. Artificial flower”
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“Ohhhh… how long can it last??”

(mahhhhhhh -.-)
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“(wtf) errrrr… it’s artificial, it can last as long as you want it to? haha”
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“Ohhhh… like that ah. Hmmmm, then when only it will die ah?”
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“Nooo, won’t die. Because it’s artificial you see. It’s not alive. Not a living plant/flower.”
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“Ohhhh… so it is dead already lah?”
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(WTF KNN serious shit, damn slapping!)
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“Err… no lah, this flower is artificial. Artificial, you know? It’s uh, fake one. Not fresh. Not real. FAKE.”
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“Ohhhhhh, FAKE ahhh?”
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“Yah.”
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“Wahh, this flower bluff me one lah.. like con lah. Ohhhh, not real lahh.. okok. So uhh, this flower, all won’t die ah?”
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“-.- NO”
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(damnnn omg already this one, seriously. epic phail)
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“Ohhhh… okok. So this one need to put water or not?”
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“Huh?? For what you want to put water?”
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“Ohhhh no need water? No, cos I scared it will die”
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 ”NO. IT WON’T DIE. WON’T. Because it is AR-TI-FI-CI-AL. You know fake? Yah, it’s FAKE. So no die die okay. WON’T.”

“Ohhhh.. hehe okay lah like that. I want, please pack for me.”
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“Okay sure”
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*then the customer gave me a sudden stare*, and said,
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“You have very pretty eyes, you know that?”
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(blushed) “Err.., thanks”
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“Your eyelashes are very lovely. Are they real one ah?”
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“Err, yeahh it’s real”
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“Ohhhh.. no, I thought like the flowers, artificial. Hehe. =)”
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MAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!-.-

OHMYGOD YOU KNOW. Seriously!! I nearly died on the spot. Flat on the floor. This one seriously slapping straight man. Somemore can “hehe” me you know.

Blood pressure can shoot up as high and as fast as how your solero shot theme park ride goes. For real.

Firstly, I thought, okay perhaps the customer isn’t so sure what artificial means. So I tried saying; not fresh, fake, not alive, like plastic flower, not real. All sorts of synonyms that I can think of.

And with all the “ohhhhhhhhh”s I got from the customer right, some shit you know. Make it sound as if understood. But NOOO, all kinds of question the customer asking.

At that moment, I just felt like dying. It’s like, please stab me kill me or shoot me, I’d feel better.

Hou kurap this one.
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Okays. 1am. Tomorrow is yet another working day. I’ll be back, wait up.

iLaters.
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Yours truly,
Cheryl, the flowers are artificial goddammit!




]]> http://cherylho.net/2009/01/16/on-flower-gerr-and-pussy-willows/feed/ 6 KNOCK KNOCK! http://cherylho.net/2008/06/19/knock-knock/ http://cherylho.net/2008/06/19/knock-knock/#comments Thu, 19 Jun 2008 06:38:26 +0000 Cheryl http://cherylho.net/2008/06/19/knock-knock/
Who’s there?????
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Someone got a haircut, well not literally a haircut. But yeah. LOOK WHO HAS BANGS NOW, HAH!

I know, I know. I look like a retarded doll. Who cares? I’m Cheryl Ho.

The other day, my college friends and I went down to Pyramid from Limkokwing cos we had this super duper long breaktime, like 4-5 hours break. So yeah. And guess who I met up with at Pyramid?
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Damn scary leh!
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Serious weh!

AH LONGS!

Ah longs from INTI, that is. Hahahhha. Michelle like samseng lah, ah long wannabe. That day I asked her why she carry such a big bag to college. She secretly whispered to me, "Because I’m Ah Long. Inside I keep my parang".
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Ah Long also asked me to take ALOT of photos with her that day in Pyramid. But I was too scared.
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I was scared that later she blackmail me with the photos. And simply take out her parang and try to con me in the Chinese way, saying that one photo with her cost RM10,000. Then I die lah that time.

I tried to runaway but you know lah, ah longs right. She threathened me withred paint. Very typical ah long.
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(ALJ stands for Apa Lan Jiao. I know, I just learnt the term too)

You see. I refused to take nice photos with her, and she gangster already showing black ALJ faces. Ah long got fed up with me. Finally, she decided to convince me to be good friends with her. She told me next time if I want to borrow money, clothes, heels, panties, tissue or whatever also, she won’t charge me interest.

She will just ask for 1 photo for each day that I repay her back late.

We had a Chinese to Chinese, Ah Long to Not-Ah Long talk for a while. And I finally decided Ah long wasn’t that bad after all.

So we yamseng with each other and shake shake hands a bit, and became friend friend.
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But one thing still, sometimes it’s hard for me to understand Ah Long. She and her very Chinese manners and words. Ah Long also taught me one thing that day, which is how to drink kopi with one leg up on the chair. Ah Long also said that it is very pantang if you don’t shake your leg on and off.

Ah Long is my best friend.
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Oh and also, Ah Long’s birthday is VERY VERY SOON!

It’s this Saturday. So whoever is not scared to party with Ah Long and Ah Long’s friends, we’ll be in Sunway (tomorrow) Friday night. Not sure at Coco Banana or Bar Celona yet. To be confirmed. ;)

Till then, all of you take care. And watch out for all ah longs on the street. Think of your loved ones.
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Yours truly,
Cheryl, Ah Long’s best friend. (:




]]> http://cherylho.net/2008/06/19/knock-knock/feed/ 0 The Internet Plays A Role http://cherylho.net/2008/02/29/the-internet-plays-a-role/ http://cherylho.net/2008/02/29/the-internet-plays-a-role/#comments Fri, 29 Feb 2008 10:28:48 +0000 Cheryl http://cherylho.net/2008/02/29/the-internet-plays-a-role/
..not only for researches you have to do for boring assignments, or maybe going on Instant Messaging with friends, or supporting piracy by downloading songs, but also…

..coming out with hilarious comedy videos on the upcoming election in Malaysia in where else other than the widest video engine site; YouTube.
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Fuck sial, I watch can laugh until die man. No offence to any political parties or whatsoever lah, I’m just an ordinary blogger in this town who’s doing her role in the blogosphere; sharing the joke.
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Elections Blah Blah Blah

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And you so have to watch this one also..
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Rough Little Indian Boys

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Hahahha.. Aiseh.

Politics politics politics. I have no comment. But btw, James asked me to add Lim Kit Siang (DAP Chief) on Facebook. It seems that James added Lim Kit Siang on Facebook on Saturday.. And on the next day, Sunday, Lim Kit Siang approved his request.

I want to find for Samy Velu weh. Then wish him Happy Birthday on election day. eheh.

Eh serious okay. Samy Velu’s birthday falls on the election day, March 8th. I was first informed by my Indian friend, Jewin Kumar. Eh brada, don’t doubt him okay.. they know best.  Confirmed "correct correct correct!"
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Yours truly,
Cheryl, updates on LKW’s Gala dinner soon.. =)

]]> http://cherylho.net/2008/02/29/the-internet-plays-a-role/feed/ 1 Ms. Swan http://cherylho.net/2007/11/20/ms-swan/ http://cherylho.net/2007/11/20/ms-swan/#comments Tue, 20 Nov 2007 04:15:01 +0000 Cheryl http://cherylho.undebug.org/2007/11/20/ms-swan/ .
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It’s Add Maths today, and Paper just ended at 10am.

I got home, changed my clothes, washed myself up a little, and went STRAIGHT TO BED.

I slept for bout an hour plus man… and gee WOW, like though there’s no Add Maths Paper 2 later. Oh maybe there’s no PHYSICS tomorrow as well.
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Anyway, who gives a shit. I woke up, and I watched Ms Swan on YouTube. Again. I was watching her the night before Add Maths papers before I went to bed.

She is D Bomb man. Ms Swan is <3 ! I can’t believe I’m not practicing or revising my Add Maths now, but blogging about Ms Swan.

Okay.. who in the muthafck’n hell is this swan?; I hear you ask. Watch.
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Miss Swan At Starbucks.
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LMAO! SHE IS SOME SHIT I TELL YOU.
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Okay I better go see what I can do with my Trigonometry, since the trigo question in Paper one was being a "tricky dicky". Ahhah

Thanks to Ikhwan who found this ms swan video, now I’m all MS SWAN-NY and I can’t get enough of her shit. Lol :P
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Yours truly,
Cheryl, I lost all my pictures in my comp thanks to my fck’n loqware.. urgh!
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]]> http://cherylho.net/2007/11/20/ms-swan/feed/ 0 Tsk.. Whatever http://cherylho.net/2007/11/10/tsk-whatever/ http://cherylho.net/2007/11/10/tsk-whatever/#comments Fri, 09 Nov 2007 16:01:03 +0000 Cheryl http://cherylho.undebug.org/2007/11/10/tsk-whatever/ .
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(bimbo tone) Like… What-evahhh..

Okay, I don’t do it best. She does. Watch this.
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"Do your hand, do your hand. Say What-evahh.."

Ahhahahh frik’n cute man. Now it’s stuck in my head. "What-evahh.."

My god. Of all things to train a baby to say; in SUCH TONE. Well at least it’s better than training to say the word "fuck" I suppose.
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Darn why wasn’t I cute like that when I was a baby? Why didn’t I have cute videos like that? Yeah, I think you’re right; mommy and daddy didn’t own video cameras back then.
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Yours truly,
Cheryl says, "Like What-evahhh" (I’m cute like the baby right… No? Yeah maybe not. Cos I’m cuter.) HAH! Wtf okay whatever seriously.
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